Lovely County Citizen Police Beats

Most of these are just truely funny!
http://www.lovelycitizen.com/police/

Monday, Nov. 5
  10:17 a.m. -- No one was injured when two vehicles collided on US62E.
  12:30 p.m. -- A vehicle parked on Montgomery St. was vandalized.
  12:48 p.m. -- Police were unable to locate a possibly intoxicated driver reportedly motoring on US62E.
  2 p.m. -- The operator of a US62E discount store reported someone making unauthorized deposits in the store's dumpster.
  7:35 p.m. -- A Commerce St. resident reported a wedding ring stolen.
  11:08 p.m. -- After police arrived, a domestic disturbance at an
Alamo St. residence ended quietly when both parties separated for the
night.
Tuesday, Nov. 6
  6:03 a.m. -- A Prospect Ave. inn operator was asked to keep his barking dogs quiet.
  9:12 a.m. -- Police were asked to deliver an emergency message
to a person in the "metropolitan area" but were given no specific
address.
  11:43 a.m. -- A minor, private-property traffic accident occurred in an upper Spring St. parking lot.
  1:17 p.m. -- Police were asked to check on the welfare of an E. Mountain resident and found the person sleeping peacefully.
  3:42 p.m. -- An attempted burglary was reported at a Mountain St. residence.
Wednesday, Nov. 7
  Another slow day for crime passed quietly.
Thursday, Nov. 8
  12:39 a.m. -- An intoxicated driver was arrested on Huntsville Rd.
  3:29 p.m. -- A panhandler who had been ejected earlier from a
Spring St. confectionary returned to complain to potential customers
that he had "found a toenail in his chocolate."
Friday, Nov. 9
  12:30 p.m. -- An officer cited the driver of a delivery truck
on Spring St. who was running his route after the 11 a.m. curfew.
  3:03 p.m. -- A Jordan Dr. resident summoned police when she told them "a possum was stuck in her grill."
  8:50 p.m. -- Hospital personnel told police they were treating a person who had been bitten by a dog.
  9:22 p.m. -- Police were asked to check on the welfare of a
"woman walking in a ball gown" on US62W and escorted her to the edge of
town where she continued her lonely sojourn, apparently all dressed up
with nowhere to go.
Saturday, Nov. 10
  12:15 a.m. -- Two officers were invited to attend a fight at a S. Main St. nightclub and accepted in less than two minutes.
  3:25 a.m. -- Loud drunks whooping it up in the parking lot of a US62E motel were asked to leave the premises.
  5:01 a.m. -- The operator of a US62E fast-food franchise asked
an officer to escort her through the building after she discovered an
open door upon her arrival for work.
  8:52 a.m. -- Following a report that jewelry had been stolen
from a US62W motel room, the complainant called to say the baubles had
been found and had only been misplaced.
  10:32 a.m. -- A resident of a US62E motel reported receiving threatening phone calls.
  12:31 p.m. -- The owner of a S. Main St. business was summoned
to secure her building after a patrolling officer discovered a door
open.
  2:17 p.m. -- An officer investigated a complaint from a US62E
motel operator about a suspicious female who called her at 3 a.m. and
said one of her guests was indulging in drug-related activities.
  2:17 p.m. -- An officer was summoned to a US62E motel to
document harassing phone calls received by a guest and stumbled upon a
domestic disturbance which resulted in an arrest.
  9:16 p.m. -- Although police received a heads-up from an
alert carriage driver, an officer was unable to locate "an intoxicated
female walking around at Center and Mountain yelling."
  10:03 p.m. -- A two-car accident occurred near the city limits on US62W.
Sunday, Nov. 11
  11:15 a.m. -- A car was damaged in a hit-and-run accident while parked overnight at a US62E motel.
  1:14 p.m. -- A minor traffic accident occurred on US62W when a
motorist failed to negotiate a curve and drove straight into a motel's
garden, taking down a sign indicating that a curve was ahead.
  4 p.m. -- A mother asked police to check on the welfare of
her son at a US62E motel which had been visited repeatedly by
authorities over the weekend.

Monday, Nov. 2
  10:56 a.m. -- A purse was reportedly stolen from a downtown shop.
  12:04 p.m. -- A minor traffic accident occurred in the hospital parking lot.
  1:56 p.m. -- A private-property traffic accident occurred at a US62W motel.
  3:34 p.m. -- An Avo St. resident told police she was surprised when
she returned home and found three uninvited people in her home.
  6:54 p.m. -- A caller complained about being "cut off in traffic" near the hospital.
  8:50 p.m. -- A caller from a US62E music show told police
there was something suspicious about people "lurking around the pumpkin
patch."
  10:56 a.m. -- A person named in an outstanding warrant from
Benton County was arrested during a routine traffic stop on S. Main St.
Tuesday, Nov. 3
  9:25 a.m. -- The animal control officer took custody of a Pit
Bull which wandered into a N. Main St. business and refused to leave.
  11:56 a.m. -- An intoxicated person "was arrested in the street" on S. Main.
Thursday, Nov. 5
  1:18 a.m. -- A Mountain St. resident called 911 to report a medical emergency but failed to provide a house address.
  1:40 a.m. -- A person was arrested after fights broke out at a Mountain St. pub.
  2:48 a.m. -- An officer assisted EMS personnel as they tended to the victim of a fight at a US62E motel.
  4:25 a.m. -- Two officers were unable to substantiate a
complaint about a man with a gun who allegedly stole a phone at a
Historic Loop hotel.
  12:57 p.m. -- Fuel was reportedly stolen from a US62 station.
  2:07 p.m. -- An officer responded to a report of a disturbance
at a US62E fast-food franchise and discovered a woman who refused to
get out of a car.
  3:15 p.m. -- A detective stopped a truck pulling a trailer without lights on US62W.
  8:46 p.m. -- A caller alerted police to a dog barking near the intersection of Ridgeway and Fuller Sts.
Friday, Nov. 6
  12:16 a.m. -- An officer retrieved a credit card spaced out at a US62E liquor store.
  2:39 a.m. -- A false alarm was triggered at a US62E motel.
  9:15 a.m. -- A room was damaged at a US62E motel.
  9 p.m. -- Police were unable to locate a possibly intoxicated driver headed for town on Hwy. 23S.
Saturday, Nov. 7
  9:28 a.m. -- A dog running loose on US62E was taken to doggie jail.
  10:23 a.m. -- A minor traffic accident occurred on US62E.
  10:24 a.m. -- A caller reported her vehicle was damaged during the night while parked on upper Spring St.
  12:12 p.m. -- An officer responded to numerous complaints
about a preacher screaming at people in Basin Spring Park, checked his
permits and determined "All complaints covered under the First
Amendment."
  1:13 p.m. -- A minor traffic accident occurred on N. Main St.
  1:16 p.m. -- An officer investigated "suspicious
circumstances" reported at a US62E motel and all he found was "a mess
to clean up."
  10:43 p.m. -- A private-property accident occurred on Mountain St.
  10:50 p.m. -- Two officers investigated a Pivot Rock Rd. residence allegedly trashed by an "ex."
  11:30 p.m. -- A car struck a deer on Hwy. 23S.
Sunday, Nov. 8
  1:04 a.m. -- Two officers responded to a report of a
disturbance in the parking lot of a US62E saloon and interrupted a
"minor verbal dispute" which warranted no official action.
  1:48 a.m. -- Three officers were unable to locate a possibly
intoxicated man who a caller from a US62E restaurant said was "trying
to drive his vehicle out of the parking lot" but they did locate his
abandoned vehicle.
  2:05 a.m. -- A routine traffic stop on US62E resulted in an arrest for DWI.
  2:20 a.m. -- Police were asked to check on the welfare of a woman at a US62E restaurant and found her "OK."
  9:59 a.m. -- A caller asked an officer to check on the welfare of his wife who works at a US62E motel.
  11:41 a.m. -- Police assisted EMS personnel in locating a "disoriented subject" on Passion Play Rd.
  2 p.m. -- An officer controlled traffic on Hwy. 23S as firefighters extinguished a burning structure.
  2:37 p.m. -- A caller from a US62E gas station reported her vehicle's license plate missing.
  3:07 p.m. -- An employee of a US62E motel asked to speak with an officer about a "missing guest."
  9:23 p.m. -- A caller from an Armstrong St. residence asked police to search for a prowler but no intruder was found.